The Other Kevin

I had a sad, reflective experience today – I searched for the obituary of Kevin Smedley.  Yes, Kevin Smedley.

This morning I sent an email to a colleague in another department and he immediately called me on the phone to say, “Clark County used to have two Kevin Smedleys and I just wanted to call you and let you know that I appreciate you.”  He then told me that the other Kevin Smedley had passed away last Friday suddenly, from a heart attack.  He was 4 years younger than me.

I first became aware of the other Kevin Smedley in November 2006, when I came to work one day and my email account had been wiped out, erased, kaput – apparently IT couldn’t wrap their heads around the idea that two Kevin Smedleys could work for Clark County.   So over the years, we’ve taken each other’s phone calls and received each other’s emails from time to time.  We work at different locations, but we met each other once or twice, just so we could see each other’s faces.  But mostly we wished each other well and “hope you have a wonderful day” when we passed along emails and voice mails.

Kevin worked for the Department of Family Services in their foster and adoptions programs – work that I imagine could be very rewarding and, at times, quite heart rending.  He was interviewed occasionally and people I know would ask if they had heard me on the radio – “no, it was the other Kevin Smedley.”

From what I know of him and from hearing from those who knew him, he is a wonderful person.  I am sure he will be deeply missed.  I’m grateful to have someone who could be mistaken for me who was so kind, friendly and loving.  I hope I did him the same favor.

His passing, so suddenly, has caused me to pause and reflect even more on goals for the coming year.  I realize that my goals can be shallow and perfunctory or, with the reflection caused by today, rather I hope to add more meaning and purpose to my goals.  Make them something that can help me to really improve each day.  So I have decided to take some extra time and craft and measure my goals against the yardstick of “what if it was the other Kevin?”  Would I be happy and satisfied with the life I had lived?  So now, I focus to create better goals.   How do I want to shape and add to my life so I can be a truly better husband and father, a person who can help others in meaningful ways, a more devoted disciple of Christ?

I made a point to walk outside and watch the sunset for the final time this year – its brilliant orange glow on the clouds, fading to pink and then to gray.  Soon it will be the dark night.  I couldn’t help but think of the family of “the other Kevin.”  I wonderful if that is how the world looks to them right now – dark and cold.  I am saddened for their loss.  And yet, their separation is only temporary, just as I know the sun will rise again and cast light on this part of the earth.  Tomorrow will be a new day, full of possibilities, hope, work, play; and family and friends – both near and far.

So I end with a portion of the message I sent to those who thought they were sending “the other Kevin” an email, but it arrived in my email box:

Hello,

You have reached the other Kevin Smedley - yes, Clark County is lucky enough to have 2 of us . . .  I have copied him, so he got your message.  No need to reply to this message.

Have a wonderful day,

Kevin